2.15.2011

in the still of the night...

It seems I have lost the ability to relax. 

Thursday night, my husband went out to spend some time with an old friend who was back in town for a few days. The babe was sleeping peacefully in his room.  I had basically the whole house to myself.  Alone.  Can you comprehend the enormity of this situation for the mom of a toddler?  Apparently, I couldn't either. 

I could have scrapbooked.  But, that would have required planning ahead.  All of my on-hand supplies are neatly organized in George's closet.  To risk waking him for the love of my hobby?  Not a chance.

I could have sat with a glass of wine and watched HGTV or whatever else I wanted.  Well, okay, I did indulge in a very delicious glass of chocolate wine.  The television plan didn't work out so well.  Since we had programmed the DVR to record two shows at once, it was either watch one or turn off the tube.  It got turned off.

So, what did I do with all that precious alone time?  I washed dishes, straightened up some things in our bedroom, made a grocery list and looked through recipes to make  a meal plan for the week ahead. Oh, and I spent a good amount of time online trying to figure out how to get my hair in one of those artfully messy buns (like Christina on Parenthood).  Because I am so hopeless at doing my own hair, always have been, and need some kind of course on what is likely the easiest hair trick going.  For my effort, I came way with this:

Me time = FAIL

Being still and taking time for myself used to be a given.  Now, it is such a foreign concept that I'm hard pressed to do the smallest thing for myself. Is this a new mom thing?  Is it just a normal part of taking on so many different roles?  Or, am I an anomaly? 

3 comments:

  1. What is this time for yourself that you speak of? I probably would have done the same thing. There is always SOMETHING that I should be doing, so even if I wanted to relax, I'd feel guilty doing so.

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  2. Beieve me, dear! You are quite normal!!! It happens to us all..when we become mothers, wives, etc.!!!

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  3. I think perhaps ... your moms comment is spot on, you'll get used to it eventually, but it takes time. I was a "napper" ... whenever I had free time, I'd think of a million things I could do around the house, but would ultimately lie down on the couch and fall asleep for a bit, it definitely takes up some time, but kills my sleep for the rest of the night. Hmmm ... Kindle perhaps!

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